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Monday, 13 January 2014


I am feeling very emotional. In inspiring the world, I have lost myself, I inspire thousands, which is a great feeling, but how do I inspire myself? I feel confused, I am waging war on several fronts, I am terribly unhappy, because there is no one I can share my pain with. I am unable to understand one thing: Why do I need a man to love me? It is a burning need in me to be loved as a woman, yet , I am forever destined to have many men friends, with whom I do not feel a romantic connection with. Who do I share my pain with? I am counselling people individually, but where do I go , whom do I tell, that I am just a normal woman who has her battles? No one is caring enough for me. After thinking about this fact , I feel it is my fate- no one can change it! God has decided that I will remain alone forever, I cannot question Him why, I just accept His Destiny for me! I am very strong, very self- confident, but when it comes to matters of the heart, I fail! Several times! Finally, trying to accept that which I cannot change! It hurts though!

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